“How are you always so happy all the time?” ” How do you always have a smile on your face?” “I wish I had your energy.”
I was listening to one of my favorite Pastor’s the other day, and he said: “Your presence on the earth has a purpose, and purpose is always the solution to a problem.” So my reaction was to spend some time with myself, in my thoughts, ensuring that I am working on my purpose, not my preference.
We live in a society where we get what we want when we want it, and there is no other option. But what if we delayed that gratification? What if we had the means to say something mean to someone because we are hurting, but we took a step back, a deep breath, so we can be respectful to said person (when really all we want to do is throw hands)? What if we cooked at home & fed our bodies what it needs, rather than being “too busy” and ordering out every day? And what if we devoted ourselves to our health, so we could be more productive, rather than running around so busy we can’t even think (& then we can’t function because we’re tired, we’re lacking energy, we’re gaining weight)?
Delaying gratification is not meant to hurt us. It’s meant to shape us, to train us, to bring out the best for our lives. Have you tried to be patient? Or are you just in such a rush that you forgot that good things take time to develop? Did you forget that if you don’t practice, you won’t perform well?
Happiness and joy are not the same things.
When I get asked how I wear a smile, no matter the situation, people sometimes get frustrated with my answer. I have joy, but I’m not happy all the time. I struggle, especially with people (a lot!). Also, I get annoyed and frustrated easily. I may vent about something silly to a select person (typically my mom or one of my girls), but I can easily calm my brain and focus on the task at hand. It might feel good to talk smack about someone. It might feel good at the moment to eat whatever is easy. Also, it might feel right at the moment to cram through a school assignment or a work task, meanwhile skipping a workout to move your body. But what does any of that do for you? Absolutely nothing besides use emotional energy, drain yourself out, and prove that everything else around you matters more than your personal health.
I’m nowhere near perfect. I definitely find myself submerged in building training programs, helping clients at any hour of the day, looking for a quick snack so I can get back to being productive at my computer. But I’ve been spending time in my own thoughts, working on progressing in the area of delaying my gratification for a better outcome on the other side!
Here are some of the examples during my life:
When it comes to food, I am all for quick and easy fixes to fuel me through the day. Shifting
from busy on the go life to working from home, I have found that my body is happier when I am nutrient oriented (your body will actually thank you). I have learned so much about my body’s response to foods lately – ensuring I have a fruit smoothie mid-morning to keep my energy high, big salad midday, and dinner with as much color as I can have (all the veggies)! I used to think I had to be super quick about food because of my schedule, but I never gave myself the time to understand how foods affected my body. Slowing myself down and giving myself the time to enjoy the kitchen has helped my physical body so much!
Never have I thought that I would be able to do a handstand (okay, I still can’t). But I am working on it. I am working on getting better at running again, after not running at all for 3 years. Also, I am practicing some yoga flow to keep my body moving. I am practicing. All of the pieces I am working on right now are going to provide my body with an ability to move and function at a level that I have never seen or felt before. I know it is going to take time, practice, and dedication once the motivation to get good at these things goes away. But I want to get better, so I can’t just push doing a handstand to the side because I’m still scared to flip myself upside down.
3. My work & finances
Have you ever seen my blast how awesome I am over social media? I do blast how awesome my clients are within my Facebook group for my clients. But I am not throwing my work advancements down people’s throats. To be honest, I don’t think people care about my advancements. It’s not about me. My job is about what I can do and provide to make YOU better. I might be awesome, but blasting that all over and promoting what I’m doing everywhere when God has said “hold on, let me get you in position,” would defeat the purpose. I need to delay the gratification of getting everything I want right now, so I can do it His way, in His timing, so you have everything you need to be successful.
4. My personal relationships
There has been a hard stop and a hard reflection process going on with my relationships at the moment. If you want to know more about my personal delaying gratification within my personal relationships, feel free to email me!
There is never a “good time” to take a step back and reevaluate, which is why you have to do it now. Make a goal sheet. Write down your vision. Reflect on the steps to get to said vision (even if they are the babiest of steps, write it down). Work with intention (don’t work to be busy while thinking you’re working hard). Monitor what you’re listening to and watching. Surround yourself with people who are going to hold you accountable for a crazy goal process you have. Drink your water. Move daily.
You’ll be surprised that smiling every day while doing these things, is actually easy! It’s harder to be miserable if you have goals written out, fuel yourself properly, move your muscles, and have productivity in your daily life! Also, please spend time in your Bible. It’s the best “self-help” book you could ever purchase. It’s the blueprint for how to live a blessed life.
I hope you read through this and a few things stuck with you. I hope you pause where you are and reflect on where you’re going. Also, I hope you take care of your body and your mind.
Be Blessed Always, Coach Cate